What is the intention of this post? Need some sympathy? trying to impress someone?

That was a comment for a previous post.. And good point mate. Wasn't intended that way. Am but a stranger in an even stranger land who is forced to keep himself occupied any way he can. Do indulge me.

Its a scary thing to have time on your hands.. and your thoughts alone are truly a terrible place to be in. You dream back about improbable ways, of different days, of eyes when i was still, of pain and eloquent grafitti, of visions too removed to mention, of all that i've disappointed, of all the souls i took into the night, of doubts, of lifetimes imagined, of damages done, of thoughts that cant stop wandering, of being preoocupied as my world stumbles and falls. Someone save temptation.

The way of life is a funny thing... Teaches you that the things you want the most never seem to be the one that happen. The best of plans laid amount to naught.

But again, its late into a lonely boring night and i have but little sticks of cancer and melancholic playlists to keep me company.. Then again daylight will hopefully bring better tidings and things to do.

Aaaaarghhh!

I just sat here for an hour typing a new update, when firefox crashed and I lost the whole damned thing. I've gotta go play some violent video games for a while or something....I guess I'll try it again later. .... Oh, and did I mention DAMMIT!

not every post deserves a title

Its a super boring Wednesday, and I am trying to look extremely busy (it’s an essential part of my job-list everyday). So anyways was trying to figure out what to write. Actually to be honest, I’ve been trying to figure out what to write since yesterday. So for the lack of anything better, shall make a list of my achievements in these 24 years of existence.

Mind you, its not a small list. And yes, there are many things in here that most of you are probably dying to do and most that you definitely shouldn't.

Changed a baby’s diaper
Lied to a government official
Lied to many government officials
Said ‘I Love You’ and meant it
Taken an ice cold bath
Screamed as loudly as I possible could have
Gotten drunk on 12 bottles of beer
Seen a near total eclipse with naked eyes
Wished on a shooting star
Kissed a complete stranger
Had a candlelit lunch with 4 other guys in broad daylight (what inspires us i am yet to figure out)
Sat out of class for most of a semester
Gotten drunk and puked into a well
Given more than I could afford to a charity
Slept in a car all night
Slept in class
Slept at work
Stayed up all night and watched the sunrise (Farewell to the original W400s)
Patted a snake...
Been bitten by a squirrel
Taken a sick day off when I wasn’t ill
Been bullied by girls in school
Slept under the stars on a grassy knoll against a lake in coll
Giggled when my best friend was Hindi poetry reciting, making him fail
Had amazing friends (And still have them!)
Lost weight And then gained more
Survived a fatal accident.. my mom doesn't know
Broken someone’s heart
Edited the school newspaper
Sang loudly in the car - was the only time I'll ever be in an antakshari
Hugged a photograph to sleep
Had seven straight tequila shots
Eaten camel
Gotten the entire class detained because I broke the window and didn't own up
Lied to get out of trouble
Taken a martial arts class - got a black belt
Loved someone I shouldn’t have
Gate crashed at a party
Been to weddings of people I don’t care about, just to eat good food
Gone without food for 3 days
Read, and understood Richard Bach or what he wanted to say,... i think
Had a crush on a girl when i was 4
Been obsessed with jigsaw puzzles
Been a geek in school
Made panneer .... burnt it
Made dal... learnt you aren't supposed to open the pressure cooker mid way
Hurt myself to see if i can stand the pain ... (okay i was bored someday)
Kissed someone so passionately, it made them dizzy
Been on a trek
Crossed a valley on a rope
Seriously contemplated pushing a nagging cohort int the valley
Cast my vote for someone I couldn’t care less about
Played in the rain
Kissed in the rain
Played in the mud
Been buried in sand
Nursed broken hearts
Been blamed for things I did not do
Been punished for things I did not do
Walked scotfree for things I have
Been caught umpteen times for things I have done
Walked on the beach at midnight with a girl
Lounged around in bed all day
Fit three weeks miraculously into 3 days
Felt truly happy about my life
Felt absolutely miserable about life
Straightened my hair
Had suicidal thoughts
Stolen a bittergourd from a neighbors garden and been forced to return it later by ma
Skipped all my school reunions
Apologized to someone years after inflicting the hurt
Read Godfather many times over... Felt like a man each time I read it
Read Love Story many times over ... Felt mushy and sad every time I read it
Won a bet
Lost tons
Made lots of bad choices
Read a lot
Listened to music a lot
Watched movies a lot
Been on the phone a lot
Stared out at open space a lot
Inherited all my grandpa's books
Fired a rifle
Learnt Autocad... you'll have to be a user to understand how difficult that is
Been in love with my computer
Been operated on my eye and saw through the entire thing
Taken a holiday all by myself
Appeared on a Radio show
Made a website and assorted paraphernalia for a coll fest... turned out decently enough
Lied to close friends
Cheated in a card game
Secretly wished harm to someone
Smoked up
Been cynical, sarcastic, caring, romantic, hopeful, perplexed, eclectic in combinations

i can go on and on, but seriously, i do have deadlines!

Nights of the living dead

Why is it that on any given weeknight, by 11:00 I am dog tired and can easily fall asleep, and I usually wake up around 6:00ish without the help of an alarm. 7:30 if I am lucky. And I usually take a little nap at work in the afternoon too!

But on the weekends I end up not being able to fall asleep before 2.00 am and on Saturday morning I was awake at 5:00am and on sunday I MADE myself stay in bed until 6:00 even though I was awake at FOUR O'CLOCK IN THE MORNING!!!! I have weekend insomnia.

And it really sucks.

Most normal people can sleep in on the weekends. Most normal people can sleep IN when they stay up late. Not me. Even if I stay up until 4:00am I still wake up at six. It is a curse. The few times I have slept in I feel all discombobulated.

Right now I just have a headache. And the coffee machine in office hasnt been refilled so I am having to wait out my morning coffee (even if it tastes like mud flavoured with caffeine, I NEED MY COFFEE). This all makes me quite grouchy.

Hopefully a huge lunch will straighten me out today. We will see.

okay thats weird

i can post, but cant read them

damn the indian gov and their half assed trysts with technology. i spent 10 mins on the last post.

Whew... I still have my precious webspace

took me 7 bomb blasts and overkill by the government to remind me to come back.

aah, what can i say... have been gamboling all over kerala, delhi, punjab and the southern part of the peninsula. been eventful but nothing of note really. just that my premonitions of a soporofic life have become far more frequent now. after much deliberation and delightful nail biting, gave up on that delightful little cancer stick that I had so come to love. not exactly the time of my life.

been having trouble sleeping, taking forever to get to sleep and waking up hour after hour, restless turning, never feeling rejuvinated unsure of whether or not i was asleep 10 minutes ago or simply staring into the darkness. but the dreams, the wild dreams, i love them. amazing confuzing dazzling ridiculous that i never want to end. the emotions that continue to run through to the waking hours like aftershock waves of an earthquake. they are ridiculous but make me feel strange all day. the best is when i can let myself slip back and pick up the dreams from where i stopped last time around.. prequels, sequels, parallel plots. its all there

now i'm awake.. and office beckons. damn.

Goodbye Cruel World

Okay its not a cruel world..... its only for two weeks.... and i'll be back

Dont give a Horse's Arse

(Overheard at an undisclosed location)

Guy 1:
i want bigger shoulders , pecs , abs and big arms but dont wanna get too big , just 'toned'

my diet is great - i drink diet coke and cereal bars for breakfast and for dinner low fat yogurt and burger with no bap (i was told carbs are bad)

i dont want to go to gym so do 5000 situps three times per day - 900 pressups and bicep curls with a 10kg bar

will i look like brad pitt from fight club ??


Guy 2: (okay not a guy, Guy1's ultra-sycophantic girlfriend)
You already do, skinny soft lad!

Guy 3: (gags)
yes your body will but your face will still look like a horse's arse



I have no idea, why this conversation is relevent at all in any context.... but i cant get it out of my head... Is there actually such a phrase as "horse's arse"? I had developed a suspicipon that "horse's ass" was actually an alternate term for "mule" and not actually to do with farm animals' rear ends. Enough with the etymology already, my ma wants me to have my well deserved bath.

Jennifer Lopez has been shot

Jennifer Lopez, the popular entertainer, has been shot.




UPDATE!
Jennifer Lopez has NOT been shot, not even slightly. I was confusing her with singer Marc Cohn. I apologize for any distress this caused.



Singer Marc Cohn, known for the 1991 smash hit "Walking in Memphis," was shot in the head Sunday during an attempted carjacking in Denver but survived, his manager said Monday.


Our thoughts must be with Mr Cohn's family at this difficult time

What have i done ?

Aarghhh ...

i know...

this is going to be another one of those half assed ventures that i'll hardly venture into