Wednesday, April 25, 2007

Boyles Law of Public Transportation

From where i come from, its not a great experience using the inter city public shuttle service. Was a bit a squeeze on the bus yesterday. Everyone who didn't have their face violently pressed against the windows or the armrests were wrestling furiously not to fall out the doors. All thanks to Boyle's Law about pressure being inversely related to volume. And that was at constant temperature. Well, its almost May and this might easily be the most unfashionably hot part of the country. And I spent nearly the whole journey -a nightmare three hour ride through dusty, humid roads- standing up. True to physics, pressure and volume - they didn't seem to let up.

Before it left though I waited to see if I could get a seat; otherwise I was going to hire a taxi, and charge the company however much it took. I found a seat, and it was all going well, but the driver decided he could squeeze a few more stinky passengers on board, and kept making stops. Then a crone got on. And then another one and another one. For several minutes I ignored them all, hoping that they would go away or that someone else would see them and do the gentlemanly thing. Darned women. Kept staring at me with that pitiful expression. So in the end I gave one my seat, albeit with utmost resentment and bad grace.

Had we not been jammed in like cooped chicken I would have fallen flat on my face several times, for the driver was the usual idiot, hurtling around bends as if he only had five minutes to live. After ten minutes of this I was sweating like a pig in a sauna, and soon I was aching all over. At times I only had one foot touching the floor. A poor sick child dropped a toy and I bent down to pick it up. The driver just then decided to play Carmageddon, as everyone was flung to one side, and for several moments my head was trapped. My neck was twisted like an owl's and the side of my face was squashed into the stomach of the surly peasant next to me, a stinking oaf in a vest.

It was most unpleasant.

Point of the Post - Use company perks. Thats what they are for.

5 comments:

Anonymous said...

im upset with this post.

Anonymous said...

ROFL!! that was one howlarious account of you nearly becoming a turkey sandwich. obviously you are not boYled and bruised all over. might as well get cleaned up in a pig pen :P

btw...you took the form of so many of the higher species during that bumpy ride. interesting..watching animal planet a lot lately? :D

Jane

Bourbon Legend said...

yeah... and my penchant for barnyard animals.. god knows what inspires me. i no hoo definitely does.

Biju K said...

machi have always been a slient reader of lot of other pieces of yours....some were written as if they wer not meant to be understood..but this one was good...simple funny practical...keep writing stuffs like this....that was good..

Bourbon Legend said...

will do da..

for you... definitely.